This is quite of a long story but.. Here's the story as short as possible...:
I honestly have no idea what happened, but since like a week ago, I've been feeling "sad", I never smile/laugh anymore unless someone is being very funny, but then I put on a serious face asap, which is very weird because I used to laugh literally all the time..
I used to be that person who's trying to cheer everyone up and helping people that have lost hope in life, telling them why and how they should live their lives, I know this might sound a bit cheesy but it's the truth, I really do love helping people with life and happiness.
Now I constantly ask myself "Who am I?", "Why am I still alive?", "Where am I?", "What am I doing?", etc... Before, I thought I understood life and knew what to do, but something got to me and now I'm like this.. I mean, I still have all those quotes in my mind, but it's so hard to apply them to my life. It's just like when you're trying to make a 4 block jump on parkour, you know how to do it, but it's just so hard (for me as a pk nub anyways)
Something that started happening today is that, whenever I'm doing something, I would suddenly start stressing out really bad and have to stop doing whatever I'm doing, and it sucks. Also, I'm VERY impatient, when I used to be the most patient person I know of..
My Carrot (irl best friend, kinda sorta, about her name, it's another story xd) says that it's because I've been doing those things for a long time, because I've suddenly stressed out while I was playing the piano, violin, Minecraft, reading, even watching YouTube and talking to friends. And I've been doing this stuff for almost all my life. So basically, it could happen anytime, whatever I'm doing.. And I hate it. It usually happens 30-45 min after I start doing a thing.. Any idea why?
And I just often stress out for no reason..
I've talked to my "best friends" (well the best friends out of all my friends but they're not really my besties so yeah they're my "best friends" idk another word for it) and they each gave me different advice's and are all very supportive and trying to help, but none of them really understand me, besides my carrot equisdé, bc she's basically going through the exact same thing but her situation is way worse than mine, she knows how to deal with the stuff and knows exactly how I feel, and it's been happening to her for like 2 years now...
It's like people that have depression understand me and basically have the same feelings like I do, other people are trying to do anything they can but they just can't seem to understand me, but just talking to me helps a lot c:
So if you can think of anything, it'd be very appreciated.. You can talk to me through e-mail/hangouts/yt dm (YouTube direct message)/skype @ QuartzyGlacier@gmail.com . I'll give you more info there as you ask me questions.. bc yeah, too many rules on here c:
Shout out to my most supportive fwend Darien aka CanadianTheCat ^-^ who has just always been there for me, he says that he understands me but I think that he doesn't xd, but he's just always there to talk to me <3
p.s. equisdé = xd. it kinda got stuck in my mind so yeah
Ok now if you're wondering why I call my friend my Carrot, well, irl I call her Zanahoria which means Carrot (it's Spanish, and I talk to her in Spanish so yeah). Her name is Carolina (which would be Caroline in English) and since it's a very common name, she needed to make up a username, so she went with Caro at first, then for some social medias she used Carro, well here's an evolution of her usernames on social medias loool:
Carolina (Caroline) > Caro (expensive) > Carro (car) > Carrot > Aaaaand.. I call her Zanahoria (Carrot)
And yeah I used to be a weird and random person xd ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I honestly have no idea what happened, but since like a week ago, I've been feeling "sad", I never smile/laugh anymore unless someone is being very funny, but then I put on a serious face asap, which is very weird because I used to laugh literally all the time..
I used to be that person who's trying to cheer everyone up and helping people that have lost hope in life, telling them why and how they should live their lives, I know this might sound a bit cheesy but it's the truth, I really do love helping people with life and happiness.
Now I constantly ask myself "Who am I?", "Why am I still alive?", "Where am I?", "What am I doing?", etc... Before, I thought I understood life and knew what to do, but something got to me and now I'm like this.. I mean, I still have all those quotes in my mind, but it's so hard to apply them to my life. It's just like when you're trying to make a 4 block jump on parkour, you know how to do it, but it's just so hard (for me as a pk nub anyways)
Something that started happening today is that, whenever I'm doing something, I would suddenly start stressing out really bad and have to stop doing whatever I'm doing, and it sucks. Also, I'm VERY impatient, when I used to be the most patient person I know of..
My Carrot (irl best friend, kinda sorta, about her name, it's another story xd) says that it's because I've been doing those things for a long time, because I've suddenly stressed out while I was playing the piano, violin, Minecraft, reading, even watching YouTube and talking to friends. And I've been doing this stuff for almost all my life. So basically, it could happen anytime, whatever I'm doing.. And I hate it. It usually happens 30-45 min after I start doing a thing.. Any idea why?
And I just often stress out for no reason..
I've talked to my "best friends" (well the best friends out of all my friends but they're not really my besties so yeah they're my "best friends" idk another word for it) and they each gave me different advice's and are all very supportive and trying to help, but none of them really understand me, besides my carrot equisdé, bc she's basically going through the exact same thing but her situation is way worse than mine, she knows how to deal with the stuff and knows exactly how I feel, and it's been happening to her for like 2 years now...
It's like people that have depression understand me and basically have the same feelings like I do, other people are trying to do anything they can but they just can't seem to understand me, but just talking to me helps a lot c:
So if you can think of anything, it'd be very appreciated.. You can talk to me through e-mail/hangouts/yt dm (YouTube direct message)/skype @ QuartzyGlacier@gmail.com . I'll give you more info there as you ask me questions.. bc yeah, too many rules on here c:
Shout out to my most supportive fwend Darien aka CanadianTheCat ^-^ who has just always been there for me, he says that he understands me but I think that he doesn't xd, but he's just always there to talk to me <3
p.s. equisdé = xd. it kinda got stuck in my mind so yeah
Ok now if you're wondering why I call my friend my Carrot, well, irl I call her Zanahoria which means Carrot (it's Spanish, and I talk to her in Spanish so yeah). Her name is Carolina (which would be Caroline in English) and since it's a very common name, she needed to make up a username, so she went with Caro at first, then for some social medias she used Carro, well here's an evolution of her usernames on social medias loool:
Carolina (Caroline) > Caro (expensive) > Carro (car) > Carrot > Aaaaand.. I call her Zanahoria (Carrot)
And yeah I used to be a weird and random person xd ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
